Emsplaning: Why ‘doing the right thing” doesn’t get you picked.
Emsplaining (My 8 Year old daughter inspiring today's workplace observances): Why ‘Doing the Right Thing’ Doesn’t Get You Picked
Emerson has some real amazing life observations and nuggets of wisdom sometimes. Here is one from this last week that made me sad.
Em has been watching how a "good student behavior" raffle works at her school, and she’s got feelings about it. She has been super bummed that basically her entire class has won, but she has not.
How it works: When a teacher or parent volunteer notices you doing something extra good, you get entered into a drawing. Win the drawing? You get a prize. Sounds fair, right?
Except… Emmie has never won in 4 years and rarely gets entered. Neither has her sister but we are consistently told they are wonderful, polite helpers by teachers and parents alike.
Not because they aren’t great students. Not because they aren’t kind. Their report cards prove they’re doing all the right things, working hard, following the rules, helping others.
But here’s what she’s realized: If no one notices, it doesn’t count ( ps, LinkedIn and your Resume are like that too). If you are consistent, people don’t notice you doing something new or novel as a helper, it’s just assumed.
And, wouldn’t you know it, the loud, silly kids? The ones who make sure everyone sees what they’re doing? They get noticed.
And honestly? That’s exactly how the workplace works, too.
Promotions and recognition don’t always go to the hardest worker...they go to the most visible one.
The people who quietly keep everything running? They get ‘reliable’ on their performance reviews, not ‘leader.’
The ones who are a little louder about their wins? They get rewarded.
Em’s learning something at 8 that most of us don’t realize until we’re years into our careers:
If you don’t advocate for yourself, people assume you don’t need recognition.
If you don’t speak up, people assume you’re fine staying in the background.
And if the system is built on being noticed, then being good isn’t always enough.
So now the question is: What do you do?
Start making sure people see your good work, be good PR for yourself.
Keep doing the right thing, even if no one notices of course!
Or
Build your own system where reliable, consistent, kind people actually get rewarded? (oh wait, that’s me, I am building that with some other amazing people… but she definitely inspires such things) #theplusonecollective is coming!
So extra hugs from me this week and I will make sure she knows that she wins the prize here, even with all of her 8 year old sass!
#emsplaining #howtogetnoticed #PRforyourself #keepdoingtherightthing
